God, why aren't you convicting this person?

I used to ponder and ask God, "why aren't you convicting this person of the wrong they committed against me?" Whenever I didn't get an apology or acknowledgement of my feelings being hurt. The older I got, I realized there were many lessons to be learned from them. 

If God had done so right then and there, how would that make me tougher, resilient, and more empathetic to those going through similar? Not just that, how would I learn to extend forgiveness and grace like He's done to me? Everyone's been hurt by somebody whether the words spoken were intentional, unintentional, a projection of vulnerability, a need for power and control with a desire to ruin people's lives because misery loves company. 

While it may feel like or appear God is letting them "off the hook" or invalidates and minimizes pain, He doesn't work on our timetable or operate within human understanding. 

God may have convicted that person and that person chose to ignore it. Or maybe the person isn't ready to face the truth and be held accountable for their actions because they're already in a state of vulnerability such as a physical illness, mental illness, or whatever and couldn't handle feeling "more exposed to harm" and become even more fragile. 

None of this to say makes their unkind remarks, condescending judgements, and tactless words or deeds justified or okay. It's possible to feel empathetic towards someone's struggles or conflict they have within themselves yet still hold them accountable. But accountability can be delayed or never happen in this lifetime if the person suddenly dies. When that happens and you're never given an explanation or apology, it teaches and builds your character. 

Perhaps you're learning to navigate relationships and communication with better wisdom than you used to. Or you're discovering yourself and embracing that unapologetically. I think you learn more through the unspoken and the unseen that's more powerful than an apology and changed behavior.