Saturday, October 1, 2022

For Someone Who Needs To Hear This (Singleness)

 For someone that needs to hear this...It's okay to not be on the same timetable as everyone else when it comes to relationships..It is FAR better to be single than to date or marry someone who is a loser, a jerk, or is unattractive. NEVER settle for anyone in those categories because you're scared to be alone or judged by society. We all have our own path and history that shaped who we are today. 

Perhaps you're in your mid to late twenties and just now learning to function as an adult and figure things out. Or you've experienced abuse and trauma and haven't learned what healthy relationships and boundaries look like. Perhaps you've been stunted from your upbringing which delayed your development in lots of ways. Or maybe you haven't been successful in finding good, quality people because they seemed decent at first but later on reveal their true colors and aren't willing to work, change, be educated, and so forth. Or things didn't work out due to differences that isn't anyone's fault. 

I know it's so tempting to compare yourself to others and lose confidence when your ideal expectations don't match reality. It feels unfair and discouraging especially when people dismiss and criticize without knowing details, and puts pressure on you without guiding and helping you out.

If you don't/can't find someone who's right for you in x amount of time, it doesn't define you as a whole person. Don't let fear of being alone and missing out on intimacy drive you to desperate choices that reaps misery, regret, and more loneliness. All you can do is work on yourself instead, and enjoy the things and doing what makes you happy and feel alive. What is meant to be will be.

My friend, Erin, shared an encouraging comment under my post for any singles out there who needs it <3 

"Believe me, it's worth the wait. The Lord didn't bring me and my husband together until I was 32! We didn't marry until I was 33. I met my first serious boyfriend when I was 26, which was also the same year the Lord saved me. We were engaged to be married about a year and few mos after we met, but we just weren't right for each other, so the relationship ended. It was 5 years later that I met my husband. I honestly thought I was going to remain single, and had actually come to peace with it, but about a few weeks or months before the Lord had me meet my husband, He began putting that desire back in my heart to date and find a husband again. So I began praying for a godly husband again, and sure enough, David came along, by God's grace. So, all of this to say, the right spouse (a godly man for women, and a godly woman for men) is worth the wait. Always. ❤️"